Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Christmas Everyone

The Christmas day post.  I've been thinking a lot about what I what to write about today.  Mostly I just want all those that are there for me to know that I really appreciate the love and support.  This disease is very difficult for me to handle at times and I get very frustrated at it for, what it feels like, taking away my life.  If it weren't for those special people around me to remind me that I'm still the same Dave that I've always been, than I would probably wouldn't believe that.  So thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there for me.  It's the greatest Christmas present I could ever receive right now, well other than a miraculously healed colon that is.

So we are going on two weeks since the last dose of the medication Vedolizamab.  I don't want to jinx myself and say "I'm totally getting better", but I think I've seen some small improvement.  I'm not having the vicious left side pain/cramp as often, it's been at least a week since I've had it really bad.  My body in general feels less debilitated at times and I find myself not thinking so much of my colon.  With that said though, I still have the same amount of internal mucus build up, which leads still to frequent trips to the toilet and having paper towels/toilet paper in my pants for the "Slimmer Squirts" moments. (sorry if that's to descriptive but that's what I've been calling them, still it's funny, right?) So a lot of the symptoms of UC are still with me, which means the inflammation is still turned on high in my colon.  I expect that since I'm a big guy I may have to wait till the third or maybe fourth dose of my treatment to start seeing a response.  At any rate I would just like this to go away.  Which might mean surgery.  Some of my family want me to pursue that course and not wait for this medication to "maybe" work.  I understand that it's hard for them to see me in pain and my life stuck on pause, and surgery is a way to be rid of my tormented colon.  I'm just not ready yet to go there, yet.  I'm not afraid of it anymore, but I need to see if this medication will work, because once your colon is out of your body it's not going back in.  At any rate I can take solace knowing that so many loved ones of mine really want me to get back to that vivacious Dave that I use to be.  I miss him too.

Merry Christmas everyone.  I hope today you may feel loved by those who love you.  I hope you may feel the joy of the season and peace of our saviors love for us.  I've had to rely a lot on my faith to get me through this and I'll continue too because he'll continue to be there for me too.

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